Movie : Piranha 3D

HILARIOUS!

Fast forward this movie till the 45th minute where the REAL action began. Crazy-ass effects, gory CGIs and extravagant make-up that had made me laugh like crazy during the whole feast of the piranhas. Yes, the title pretty much says everything about the movie. Piranhas attacking a community of naked people in a seriously MORBID and no-mercy way.

Filled with naked chicks and bad scripts, this movie just didn't fail to make me ROFL. In fact there was some scenes worth rewinding for the humour. (i.e The floating "penis" being ravaged by two hungry piranhas and barfed out again into a deformed ouch-looking remains of a breeding device) It gets too gruesome (think of a chick's hair got stuck into a motorboat engine and it pulls of her head-skin off) that at one-point you lose all the "ewww.." feeling and fall of your chair just laughing hard.

I just think this movie is made for sick and bored people who have a fetish of watching the human body being scraped down to the bones, alive and screaming, and legs being teared apart from the abdomen. It's just messed up to the point of not making sense anymore. And just like other monster-thriller movies the ending remains unresolved. (Director's technique of a sequel possibility) Instead of eggs being left behind, they gave us the reverse effect. The savaging piranhas were only the offspring, leaving the parents to be still alive and hungry :p

*cough* typical *cough*

Movie : The Child's Eye (Chinese)

Well, I won't say this is a "Movie of the Year" Nominee but it's not too bad. I certainly didn't regret watching it at the cinema, though it did at first scare some crap out of me. The good thing about this Pang Brothers' movie is that they don't leave you hanging in confusion by the end. Well, there were some unnecessary never ending scenes at the end parts but oh well, at least the main plot was solved.

What was kind of messed up is the title. It almost has nothing to do with the movie. At first, the title gave me an impression that someone had inherited a child's gift of seeing ghosts, or something like The Sixth Sense. But it turned out to have nothing to do with any child's eye. I would recommend the title to be "The Curse" or "The Deformed Child" or "A Mother's Sin"... That way it wouldn't give you the wrong idea about the movie, but might give away the ending xD

The moral value of the movie is to NEVER harm animals which I truly support 100%. Kill a dog and the baby in your baby will come out as one. It's a belief not only in Chinese tradition but probably around SE Asia that there are things you are just banned to do during pregnancy, in which most revolve around harming poor critters. This movie shows how a woman was cursed into giving birth to a half-dog half-human child and happened to die and haunt the hotel room, kidnapping residents because she was "lonely".

As for scary scenes, there were a few screaming-worth moments. The first one would be the 3D effect of a ghost hand about to grab the camera. And another is when one of the dudes chewed off his tongue. Yep. It came off like candy... Grosss...

However, after the storyline was revealed, the scary scenario somehow changed into sadness and sympathy. You'd understand why this haunting happened and how. And as i was watching it, the whole audience muttered an "owwwwww...." and the scariness just dissolved.

3 Stars for The Pang Brothers!

Movie : Predators

AWESOME!

It's so hard to get good movies nowadays. This movie, in my opinion is AWESOME. Filled with crazy actions and suspense i think it's worth watching again and again. The actors are good, the storyline is good, and the ending is not bad either. This movie made the CGI effect of the old Predator movie (starring Arnie as the hero and Van damme as the Predator) appears so noob. But the storyline is equally good and unlike other typical thriller movies, this one has survivors, so it makes you want to go for seconds.

It started as a group of killers, individually hand picked by the Predators were captured and released on a planet made of jungle. So they began to work together to figure out why they were sent there and each one had a special criteria that made the monsters want to play tag. So yeah, the humans died one by one, some having the chance to kill the predators some died in vain. I think 2 new species of alien were introduced in this movie, one of em a predator version of dogs. Gruesome and monstrous, and the other some nerd aliens also captured there for happy huntings.

There are so specific scenes i can call a favourite as the whole movie was really good. But there are stand out events in the movie that you might want to focus on. My personal choice would be the scene where the Japanese Yackuza dude challenged one predator for a duel. He has balls i could tell. Using his Samurai skills and appearing to be 2 feet shorter than the monster (duh! he's asian!) he managed to kill it. Right before it killed him. Another scene you might be interested in is the Predator Vs Predator King of the Ring fight, where the hero set a predator prisoner free and pleaded for assistance. (human + Predator combo is soooo cooool)

What I like most about this movie is of course, the Villains. Predators are hot creatures with 6 packs and super sexy! (mask-on of course...) But without the mask, they just look like a white version on Bob Marley.

Happy viewing everyone!

Movie : Buried

RIDICULOUSLY LAME...

It's the kind of movie you wish someone had told you not to watch. Waste of time, waste of "ooh"s and "Omagad"s and an ending which makes you just wanna throw your drinks at the usher who opened the exit door that tells you the movie is over.

The idea of the movie is, well you can say kinda cool and creative. I mean who would ever think of making a movie with only ONE actor just laying down with just a lighter and a blackberry. The whole adventure of him being in the coffin was insane and full with suspense, making people reeeeally hope at one point he would get out of there. At least it would make the pain worth endured. The whole movie was darkness. At the early part, viewers in the cinema i went to actually shouted "black out!" for the silence was like 10 minutes and i myself actually thought the tape thing was corrupted.

The movie was a good commercial add for Blackberry tho, showing viewers all the features it has and makin iPhones sound noob and uncool. Apart from that, it truly shows the evilness of Iraq people who torchers innocent Americans before finally killing them anyway. And yes, also shows how American authorities don't care for their people. The movie producers must have really got balls to do such movie that provokes both sides into pissiness. (And makes you thank God you're in neither of the countries)

So anyway, if you like thriller movies with sucky ending that makes you wanna just suicide, go ahead and watch it. If not. DON'T. You've been warned :)

Movie : Wolfman

One Word. BORING. The movie has an awesome trailer and an awesome crew of advertisers but for me it did not live up to its title. The beginning was boring, The Plot was ridiculously boring, and The Ending was Lame and Boring. The only thing that kept me watching this movie is the gorgeous Emily Blunt who plays the fiancee of a man who was killed by a werewolf, namely his own father.

And so they became a happy family of werewolves. The gruesomeness was out of place. The movie editors seem to be lazy to show too much of the wolfman i have no idea why, probably cgi was too expensive for the budget, god knows. So it became just plain with a few human heads tossed around here and there. (It dozed me off to sleep i actually had to watch this movie in 2 parts)

The script is also not carried out properly... For example "If anything ever happened to you, i would never be able to forgive myself.." was such a HUGE cliche you probably have heard it in at least 20 movies. And it was so out of place it didnt even fit in the story plot. And we would all have guessed Anthony Hopkins wasn't casted in this movie just to be a "dad". Of course everyone knew he was the villain.

The story line? Oh dont let me start on this. TYPICAL. The hero becomes a werewolf, bitten by another werewolf. Fell in love with his brother's fiancee, and even true love couldn't heal him so she had to kill him with a silver bullet. Yep. Exactly the same ending as 90 other werewolves based stories. -LAME-

Overall, if you still want to watch this, fast forward it to the 45th minute where it's finally a movie about werewolves. Good Luck!

Movie : Push

Honestly, when i was invited to watch this movie the title "PUSH" wasn't a turn on. I thought it sounded too boring. I mean seriously Push? as in "in and out"? But as soon as i read the synopsis it didnt sound so bad. Push in this movie is referred to the ability to control people's mind. Yeah something like Professor Xavier from the X men but cooler.

This movie was about a group of humans with supernatural powers. In other words, everyone is an Xmen. The other powers are Watchers (ability to predict the future based on human's decisions), Sniffers (The ability to tell a story of every object they sniff), Mover (Ability to move stuff and generate a force field as a shield) and some Screamer thing (Ability to be a freaky Asian that screams your brains out). Oh and not forgetting the dude who can erase your mind.

After watching at least 30 minutes of the movie it didnt seem bad at all. Dakota Fanning played her character well, despite her downfall in the Twilight series and the storyline was really interesting. The hero is cute. His girlfriend is hot. And the plot is smart in it's own way. The ending was unpredictable. But the lame part of the whole movie was that it made Asians look stupid and dumb. So be prepared for some really racist jokes. Or u can just simply invent some on your way through the movie.

Although filled with super cool actions and non stop awesomeness, i dont intend to watch this movie again in the short time. Maybe i will in a few years but not too soon. It's the kind of movie where you don't want to know what's going to happen. But yeah, I'd recommend it to people who like superhuman powers :P

Movie : Slice

Or humourously pronounced "Sliss" by the two stooges who watched the movie with me, Slice is by far the biggest GAY movie in history! And i don't mean that metaphorically. Expected it to be about a Siamese ghost who's in for a revenge spree, it turned out to be about a transvestite who became a serial killer. This poor dude was once sodomized by his teacher, father and peers during his teenagehood, causing him to enjoy a career as a successful "penis slicer". (and yes, there was the actual ear-aching sound of the knife slashing the dudes' genitals)

The first 30 minutes of the movie was a let down, where I'm sure everyone had trouble finding out what the hell the movie was supposed to be about. After series of flashbacks, it finally came to understanding that the slicer was a troubled teenager (and what a hell of a troubled teen) who happened to be the hero's old best friend.

In my opinion i HATE movies that consist of flashbacks especially in bad arrangements, so yeah, it sucked. As as predicted in the later part of the movie, the serial killer turned out to be someone close to the hero in the present life, having to went through a surgical transformation including (ironically) changing his penis into a vijayjay.

Overall, it was LAME. It kinda broke away Thailand's good chain of scary movie productions and gave an impression of what an awful country to live in.

-anne-

Movie : The Expandables

Well this movie was supposedly expected to blast cinemas due to the crazy cast of super A-List Action Heroes lead by Sylvester Stallone (Rocky I-IV, The Specialist) with the typical story line of a bunch of muscular guys saving some girl from a Druglord army of terrorists. No surprise the Druglord was Eric Roberts (Best of the best I, II) and Steve Austin Stone Cold of the WWE. The story opened with a boring scene where Dolph Lundgren (Universal Soldier, Masters of the Universe) has a bad case of unresolved temper that later in the movie caused him to turn to the dark side and almost killed poor Jet Li (The One, Forbidden Kingdom). -ps : Jet Li was actually the only hero worth watching at :P -

As you can see i can barely remember the names of the characters in this movie and would refer them to their real names for the high profile actors that are obviously more famous than their alter egos will ever be. And i am very sure that everyone if not at least 90% of the movie goers never really cared about the characters and just went to see Arnold (aka the Governator), Sly and Bruce Willis (Die Hard 1-4, The Sixth Sense) in one scene. -which only happened for 1 minute, sadly- And truth be told Mr Church, Bruce's character name was the only one I can remember by the end of the movie.

So the good thing about this movie is that no one (good people) died unlike the other typical action movies where someone has to die for the purpose of drama. So if there ever will be a sequel, we all can expect all the faces to return to the big screen with a different set of villains. Coz as usual, all bad guys die unless there's an egg in the end. (think Alien, Critters, Predator etc etc) And the kick-ass action filled scenes were so dramatic and awesome you won't even blink once they start.

Besides that, look out for hillarious script too... The best one in my opinion was in the one minute scene of Arnie, Sly and Bruce. "What the fk is his Problem?" Bruce asked when Arnie declined the job offer and walked away. "Oh he just wants to be the President." Sly answered causing the whole cinema to burst out laughing - plus their very sarcastic Love-Hate relationship revealed on screen was amusing. xD

Overall I'd give this movie an B+ meaning it's awesome to go see it once, but not worth to go for seconds. However if a sequel is to be released, i would go for a "sure, why not?"